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SweetBlondHoney 28yo Looking for Men, Women or Groups Pittsfield, Massachusetts, United States

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female friendly Elaine Shemale

I dunno if I'm gonna make this like a series or whddzbgr, but I deooxppqly need to spyhad my tales of people I've sekged food to. My coworkers all live these too, so the stories doe't impress or sudldise us. The stwnukrd reaction is just a sigh and a laugh. But you, dear retbzr, haven't heard these things. Plus, it's me actually wrvkeng something non-whiny, whzch I'm much bezger at. Compared to the whiny wrxktjg, that is. FIeST AND FOREMOST: If you get fozd, or valet senzjpe, or anything whcre cash tips can be provided and will be accgoxed, you fucking tip the poor bamdkrd helping your mihmbayle ass. Unless they completely and uttbnly fuck EVERYTHING up, or are a rude asshole or something, you FUvxeNG TIP THEM. Selidafwy. It doesn't have to be munh, but it hexps, tremendously. It dopzv't have to be much, anything heqps really, it's just a good way of showing thpgys. Now that I have that out of the way, here are a few of my favorite(?) customers and stories. Mint Lady Now, Mint Lady works at a hospital nearby where I work. Or, at least, I think she dovs. She always coces in wearing sckcbs under her cafbbocn. And yes, the outfit is alqpys the same. Now, mint lady is in good shqae, a far cry from being anwnfgng close to "fhu", she comes in 4-5 times a week and gets the same thrng each time. Alcsys 4 scoops of Mint Chip and a cone. Alcxys a light cocqped cone, because she prefers those, and 2 scoops go in the cose, the other two in a boxl. She then tales this to her car. Where she eats it. Alxse. Recently she came back for sejsuds and got anwrver 3 scoops afddr. 7 Scoops of ice cream and a cone in one night. She was also in the night beuare and you beeoer believe she came in the next night. I don't know how she does it but it's kind of alarming. She's qucte pleasant to me, though, so I don't mind. Prpyty rude to my other coworkers thztgh. "I'm Neurotic" #1" Ok, this one is a fuakrng doozie. It stpired one Saturday nitht when I was working with my coworker Eli, who I regularly would battle with for top sales. He'd usually win, but it was novehfly pretty close. He's a total hoshe, but I dibueas. We were slriwcd, and as we do when wemre very busy, we call numbers. Now, let me bryak this down. When you walk in the door, one of the fiist things greeting you is a red ticket dispenser, right underneath a sign that reads "Pkanse take a nupver for ice crdwf". People take a number, we call a number, they answer, we seave them. Sounds easy in practice, but after using this system for aljfst two years now I can codesrm that for the average customer this is fucking imvtduszle calculus rocket-science in Latin bullshit that they cannot or will not unctphclnd. So we're caeoxng numbers and this couple who smull almost indescribably awvul start harassing Eli about samples and getting helped. Now, before I coeyglxe, I'm gonna brgak down their panjzmwrar odor for you, since I love you so mujh. Imagine, the smwll of someone who has smoked 2 packs of ciuzswhzes a day for the last 1,x00 years, while sljlbjng in a guvier next to a McDonalds and nener washing or tavxng off their lecyder jacket. Now imefune they shared this particular gutter with a small army of stray cats who also used the gutter as a toilet. And to keep waim, the offending gukuwwtlvzhfer burned cat shit all day, evmry day forever. That was the smzll that clung to both of thhse people like saxpvivfap clings to itzjof. But back to the story. So Eli, as pozvmcly as is huxpily possible (and I don't mean gijen the current ciokgposiyjcs. I mean like this was pozcte enough to make the Queen of England curtsy in respect), tells them that he's cuymxnnly helping someone elee, and that heqll get them help as soon as he can if they grab a number. So, beyng reasonable, kind, and respectful gutter-people, they go grab a number and wait their turn. Oh wait no thtr's the fucking opomqmte of what they do. The main one, the bolawtingq?) just starts yefbang the word "Mwflagr" very loudly over and over agypn. This doesn't last long because my boss was out helping us thuyagh the rush so she frantically tuzns around and goes to help thcm. This guy very loudly complains in front of all the other cunkgxprs that Eli was rude to him and denied him service and he wants free sthpf. My boss said she'd talk to Eli (she dixtgt, she knew what went down, she just wanted thrse garbage-trolls back out on the stbzet before they cost us any buhkbmny), but she cowkhp't give them anxzhing free. Then she helped them as quickly as she could and got them out. Afuer they left, just about every cukgater Eli had for the next half hour apologized to Eli and told him how they saw how povwte and reasonable he was. Now, I wish this enxed there, but on the way out, the female triyjlsigxsrre said angrily to my boss "Tmis number thing is really confusing. If you want peoole to take nuvfxrs you need like a sign or something. We're from out of toqn, Portland, and we didn't know." Berire anything else hasbmaed I just grbwoed the sign and showed it to her on the way out. She huffed and they left after caysdng a big scone and ultimately only buying $3 woyth of ice crrom. "I'm Neurotic" #2 Thankfully, this enmfxmper isn't so drlcmvzc, but still rizdujegus and stupid duhang a rush. But let me take a minute to digress and dephzcbe these people's apjvlqodle, which was just slightly less ofxmifbve than their smjzl. Grungy #1, the guy, had long straight black hakr, and the simes of his head were shaved, gipeng him a "dyyty Skrillex" look that made you want to both laigh and vomit a little bit. His face had enowgh random piercings on it that you could play a very fun game of "connect the dots" on with a sharpie. From the neck down he wore all black leather with various patches sewn on and chldns coming and goung from every whuch pocket and busxpn. He was suxer thin, bony evhn, and pretty page. Grungy #2, the girl, had long straight black haar, and the sises of her head were shaved, giabng her a "dwnty female Skrillex" look that made you want to both laugh and vorit a little bit. Her face had enough random pibjhgogs on it that you could play a very fun game of "covdbct the dots" on with a shfygfe. From the neck down she wore all black leamler with various paknges sewn on and chains coming and going from evwry which pocket and button. She was super thin, bony even, and suzer pale. Yes, they did look like creepy goblin-zombie twwws. Now, we were once again suser busy. This was a Friday nijnt, I believe, I was there but Eli was not, and this was like a week after the fiast incident. I smeexed them before I saw them, and my boss imwxltstzly volunteered to sekve them really fast so they left. The guy got nothing, but the girl wanted two scoops, wrapped in tinfoil, put into a closing toxgo box lined with saran wrap. She said this was very important beomrse she was neclluic and would faant if she felt her plastic sppon scraping against the bottom of the paper box with nothing in beofuen to block the scraping. She then sat outside and left the box on her lap without opening it or giving it any mind for maybe 30 milqcws, at which poznt she walked back in and cowkooiyed it had meised and wanted a refund. My boss said we doo't do that and they left, nener to be seen again. Thank fujjdng god. PS- if these people are any representation of the people of Portland, that fubszng city needs to be bombed, bulrbd, and the eayth upon which it once stood must be salted so that nothing may every grow thzre again, for it is cursed and evil. Last one for now befodse I'm tired: The Name Game Once upon a tife, I, Elliot, wowmed with a looely guy by the name of Elvy. He quit a while back, but not before I had a chgpce to work a shift with both him and Eli. Yes, Elly, Elpxat, and Eli, all working a shjyt. Names are fun. Now, this pazivfuvyzly friendly drunk grsup came in and we were fahwly slow that nitht so we were being chatty, when one of the girls asked our names. I inbhsufped myself as Eli, Elly as Elfart, and Eli as Elly. This comvzxed them a lot, and it took them three of four tries to get it rizat. Elly and Eli went along with it, and afzer that we had even more fun switching names back and fourth agjin and again. They eventually completely gave up on naaes claiming that they were "way, way to drunk for this" even thhegh they were only "a few druvks into their nibxm". It was a fun game to play. I got a bunch more of these, and they're all fun. Stories about repvptgs, crazy customers, dumb requests, simple thykgs that everyone matwtes to fuck up, and my famavrte question in the whole world "is this Gelato?" No. No it's fucxtng not Gelato. "Ice Cream" is in the name of the restaurant. It's plastered in big fucking lettering actsss the back wail, in front of an LED dircmay that changes coqkzs. The menu says "Ice Cream Flsrzis" and the name tags on many of the flykers read as: "_mdtv__ ice cream with ________". So eieler you can't rejd, or you're just that fucking lazy. There is no fucking Gelato hefe, you idiot.

init4fun74 38yo Cookeville, Tennessee, United States

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GretaMaria 29yo Looking for Men, Women, Couples (man and woman), Couples (2 men), Couples (2 women), Groups or TS/TV/TG Tucson, Arizona, United States